Nothing lasts forever, and unfortunately, unfortunately, sometimes the relationship also gets cracked. When an amorous boat, traveling for years on the ocean of your union, breaks up to the nines, the most important thing is not to lose self-control. In order to lick wounds, it will take time. And that the scars on the heart are tightened as quickly as possible, we advise, as a fire, to avoid toxic behavior towards the former partner on your part.
I strongly recommend that you forbid yourself to do this after parting.
Blame yourself all over yourself
And to this, women in general are very inclined: in us since childhood, the idea that we are good only when there is a man next to us is cultivated. Accordingly, if we are alone, it means that something is wrong with us a priori: then the breast is too small, then the requests are great. In the event of termination of relations (no matter on whose initiative) it is important to remember only one thing: in everything that two people do, both are to blame. And what is the relationship, if not construction, a brick for a brick, a mental house? And if one crooked brick was laid, then the second simply filled it with cement, not wanting to improve the situation.
A photo: Getty Images
Dissolve rumors about the former or muddy
If you suddenly want to cry to your friends, and at the same time to disassemble the intimate details of past relationships, just remember that some time ago you told this man the words of love. And is it possible after a heartfelt confession suddenly to start in pursuit of listing the worst features of a former lover? And if the “beloved”, “bunny” and “cat” after the termination of the relationship suddenly turned into a “donkey”, an “idiot” and a host of other impartialities, does one really have to grieve for these relations altogether?
Do not let go of a partner
No matter how great the temptation to call to find out how things are, send SMS about your plans for a day just out of habit, share a funny video in social networks to laugh together – just promise yourself that you will not do it. Psychologists advise to reduce communication with the former to a minimum immediately after parting: call and write only when necessary, if you need to solve urgent issues.
In fact, the craving for the renewal of communication is literally the natural reaction of the body: just think, some time ago your ex was one of the closest people. So the first time after parting you have a desire to say something or something to share by inertia. The most important thing is to see the face that divides the two states: “natural reaction” and “painful denial of the situation.”
After the termination of long relationships, there are times when you want to cry for your favorite song and remember the best moments that have happened to you. And almost always the thought arises: “What if it was better then what else would it be?” It is always important to remember why the relations stopped, what became the impetus for their breakdown and what pain you experienced at the same time (if you have, after all, anything happens).
A photo: Getty Images
Here: constantly complain about how bad you are after the break; forget about work and hobbies, shut yourself up and stop enjoying life. Yes, do not argue, breaking the relationship is always emotionally hard, but it’s not the only thing that made you happy! Write a list of things that always cheer up, such as shopping or tasty ice cream, a walk with friends or a new manicure. Do not go to extremes. Change the hairstyle after parting leave the heroines of the films, but the function of “pumping the image” can positively affect your health. In general, try to return to a pleasant routine to understand that in life only one thing has changed – your “marital status” in the VKontakte network.
To throw oneself headlong into a new relationship
How is it customary to speak in such cases? Klin wedge with a wedge? And imagine, if, as an alcoholic and a true fan of wine, you would stop drinking, switching completely to rum. Whatever one may say, alcohol dependence will remain. If you really want to throw yourself all the time in search of a new relationship, and then dive into them with your head, try to think not only about your feelings. In most cases, the outcome of such relations will be unambiguous: you will understand that you did not need it at all, and most likely you will break your heart to your unexpected choice. However, new acquaintances, including with men, will allow you to lose contact with the outside world after a break in relations. The more friends and new interesting acquaintances you have, the faster it will be possible to cut the window into a brighter future.